Characters : Super Junior Members , DDangkoma and family
Rating: PG-15 , fail! crack , humour
Warning : Epic fail Crack.
(suggested song : IU - Good Day, SJ - Full of Happiness, LeeTeuk feat Krystal - Grumbling, and other Happy or Cute Songs ^^)
Summary : The reason why DDangkoma is leaving the Super Junior Dorm.
Ddangkoma remained still at the door. Hearing all those noises from the dorm, the boys were bickering again. No one knew that he was gone. Good for the reptile, he hated living at the dorm. Its time for him to explore his natural habitat .
The glass home Yesung bought was too cramp. DDangkoma detest sharing a tiny space with the other two annoying tortoises. 50cm X 70 Cm wasn't big enough for a tortoise slightly bigger than a cup. DDangkoming and DDangkomaeng shouldn't even have existed either . Annoying little brats. DDangkoma wished he could pull them out from their tiny shells and stomp on them. Their little annoying games were getting stupid to play with.
And , Lord , DDangkoma loaths to be referred as a turtle. He's a tortoise for heaven's sake. DDangkoma didn't understand why Yesung , his idiotic owner , referred to him as a turtle. Turtles live in water, not land. And all the clouds bought turtles/tortoises and named them after him. Sure, its flattering, but after a while, DDangkoma is the most common name among turtles/tortoises. DDangkoma is not amused. He wants to be as unique and weird as Yesung.
5 minutes later , DDangkoma managed to crawl to the elevator. No one noticed, except a little kid who pointed at him and said :"MOM! Look! The turtle is trying to walk out of the building!" . DDangkoma grumbled. "Nonsense!" *** 10 minutes later , The elevator reached the ground floor. DDangkoma exited and crawled to a flower pot. He stood behind it to camouflage himself. DDangkoma stood there for 15 fine minutes , trying to recall one of the million reasons he's leaving Yesung and the Super Junior members.
Firstly , it was Ryeowook. If there was one thing DDangkoma can't stand the most, it has to be sex noises. Nothing is worst than listening to Ryeowook's moans every night , regardless Yesung was fucking Ryeowook or not. If Yesung wasn't there, Kyuhyun would be slamming himself into Ryeowook's ass . Yesung or Kyuhyun , Ryeowook's moans were loud and disturbing . More disturbing than EunHae's nightly orgy session. Ryeowook is a fucking sex kitten, he thought. Moreover, if Yesung or Kyuhyun were both there, DDangkoma could never sleep for the next few days. It was too disturbing to listen to the slapping sounds that human skins made. DDangkoma wished there were such things as earplugs for tortoises. Alas, no , all he has is 2 annoying creatures with him , accompanied by discerning noises of horny male adults.
Secondly, its fucking Heebum. Everytime Heechul visited with the cat, it was hell . The feline would crawl into Yesung's room and creep towards Ddangkoma's house. And the stupid cat would try to put his disgusting furry paws in and sway it at the 3 creatures in the tank. For God's Sake , tortoises aren't fishes. DDangkoma wanted to scream to the cat to go to Donghae if he wanted to eat some fish.
If DDangkoma could talk, he would be the richest reptile on Earth. There were a few topics that would be the talk among the fanatic fangirls for the next century if he spilled them out.
1. Super Junior Members sex habit. DDangkoma would write a book about it . And it will be the bestseller of the century, beating Twilight and Harry Potter. Oh yeah.
2. Super Junior porn collection. DDangkoma tried to imagine how overcrowded the hospitals will be . Oh ,those poor fangirls, suffering from blood loss and anemia after watching those orgies. OOOH yeah. And those fanboys, brain dead from over-fantasizing if they were one of the members fucking the other real bad. ****
20 minutes later, DDangkoma never moved from the spot. It was cool and comfy hiding behind the flower pot. He tried to think of where to go, which tortoises to meet on the way. Maybe he could go to the zoo. There should be other tortoises living happily there , right? Perhaps , he had meet his other half there and live happily ever after with several tiny DDangkomas along the way.
Now , for all one knows, DDangkoma could hide in the supermarket. With that, he could eat all the leftover quality lettuce at night. The thought of it made Ddangkoma drooled a little. But then, he would grow big and get noticed by the supermarket's staff. It was a good idea though. ***
DDangkoma stiffened when he heard a familiar voice. "DDangkoma!!!! Are you there? Call out if you can hear me! " It was Yesung. The tortoise had the urge to laugh real badly . Of course turtles can't speak, how on earth was he suppose to answer to his owner? There was no response for Yesung. "Hyung, why not check around the flower pots, maybe he's eating some grass and flowers." , Kyuhyun pointed out. Yesung headed towards the row of porcelain pots . He peeked a little at the side and spotted his pet. "DDangkoma!! You're here! How did you get out ? Are you mad at me or what? " The singer picked up the turtle and checked for scars on his pet's shell.
"Hyung, maybe he doesn't like us referring to him as a turtle. He's a tortoise after all." , the younger singer commented. "But tortoises are turtles! They are land turtles!" That gave a shock to DDangkoma. Well, that just gave him one less reason to leave Yesung. The turtle gave Kyuhyun an invisible glare. Just you wait, I will crawl up to your keyboard and destroy it one day. How dare you ruin my plans.
Kyuhyun wondered why the scaly creature kept staring at him. "Are you mad at DDangkoming and DDangkomaeng? I will get you a new house for yourself if you want to. Just don't leave the dorm , okay?" Yesung received blinks from the turtle and nothing more. DDangkoma cursed silently as they returned to his hell hole.
CREDITS : FF Taken from : http://kyuhyunsgirl.livejournal.com/20639.html
lol xDDD
ReplyDelete